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You Have the Right Duty to Remain Silent

Posted by on Apr 11, 2016 in Culture War, Homepage, Humanity, Humor, Political Correctness, Questioning Authority, Racism, Worldviews | 7 comments

There once was a time in this country when “political correctness” was something that only people on the Right complained about: “Why do the Redskins have to change their team’s name?”; “Wait, ‘colored’ is all of a sudden off limits?”; “So now we can’t say ‘midget’ anymore?” No, you can’t. And you’d better not opt for “People McNuggets” either. . . . (That, by the way, is a case in point: I seriously debated whether or not to include that line above because it is potentially offensive to little people (I think that’s what we’re supposed to call them now). But the thing is, it’s also funny. Come on, admit it. It got a snicker out of you at least, perhaps even a chortle.) But the PC issue is no longer ruffling the feathers of conservatives only, but people on...

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Podcast #9: Cops, Calvary Chapel, Hell, and Football

Posted by on Sep 28, 2014 in Catholic Church, Football, God, Hell, Homepage, Humor, Podcasts, Pop Culture, Racism, Sports | 0 comments

In this episode of Drunk Ex-Pastors, Jason presents Christian with a gift that he needs but will never use; the discussion turns to whether or not the police force attracts people who were picked on in school and therefore need to take out their frustrations on the powerless and weak; we discuss the recent controversy surrounding the lawsuit against our former church, Calvary Chapel, by two of its now-deceased founding pastor’s children; we answer a Twitter follower’s question about whether Jesus and Paul thought hell was a real place of eternal torment; and lastly, Jason exhibits his laser-sharp understanding of how to win at football (besides just shooting lots of homeruns, which is obvious). Listen to Podcast #9: Cops, Calvary Chapel, Hell, and...

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Podcast #8: The One Where We Use the N-Word

Posted by on Sep 22, 2014 in Alcohol, Food, Homepage, Homosexuality, Humor, Justin Bieber, Movies, Podcasts, Politics, Pop Culture, Power, Racism, Sex, Women | 5 comments

In this episode of Drunk Ex-Pastors, Christian gives me a very special gift (hint: it’s small, sings like a little Canadian boy, and you put it in your mouth); we take feedback from a female listener who is frustrated by her former time in the church when all her “sisters in Christ” thought she wanted to steal their husbands; we delve into the issue of language and labels, focusing on whether and when it’s OK to use “the N-word” as well as whether jokingly labeling stuff “gay” or “retarded” is a retarded, gay thing to do; I bitch about my culinary needs never being met, while we hoist a poignant shot which Christian saved for the very end of the show. Listen to Podcast #8: The One Where We Use the...

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Podcast #7: Scary Movies, Dead Americans, and Mark Driscoll’s Penis

Posted by on Sep 17, 2014 in America, Homepage, Humor, Isis, Mark Driscoll, Movies, Podcasts, Pop Culture, Porn, Sex, Technology, TV, Women | 0 comments

Episode #7 of Drunk Ex-Pastors is now available to download or stream. In this installment, I explain why I don’t like movies containing red-headed twin children or the Holocaust; Christian reveals some sobering facts about ISIS and their plot to take over America (or just kill us all, we’re not sure at this point); we take some listener feedback asking about Mark Driscoll’s penis and who it really  belongs to; and lastly, Christian complains about the insensitivity of certain drivers’ parking habits, while I lament all progress in general. Listen to Podcast #7: Scary Movies, Dead Americans, and Mark Driscoll’s...

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Podcast #5

Posted by on Sep 7, 2014 in America, Culture War, Drugs, Duck Dynasty, Guns, Homepage, Humor, Isis, Moderation, Podcasts | 1 comment

Episode #5 of Drunk Ex-Pastors  is now available to download and stream. We keep our promise to do a shot in honor of all those who shared our podcast on social media this past week, and go on to extol the many benefits of alcohol, and how the moderate enjoyment of various libations can help (in the immortal words of Pink) “get this party started.” We also take some listener feedback and discuss issues like gun control, ISIS, and why I hate animals. God, I’m just a horrible, horrible person. . . ....

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Podcast #4

Posted by on Aug 31, 2014 in Beauty, Culture, Hell, Homepage, Humor, Podcasts, Pop Culture | 1 comment

Episode 4 of Drunk Ex-Pastors  is now available to download and stream. In this edition of the podcast (which is perhaps the most  entertaining and least  substantive one yet), Christian and I kick things off with a shot of 100 proof Southern Comfort, and then ramble semi-coherently about everything from the volume of Christian’s vomiting to whether one of us could kill the other without getting caught, and from the silliness of “paying it forward” to whether girls who look like their fathers are more attractive than those who resemble their moms. And for the first time we take listener feedback and address one of our detractors. Also, we drink way more than...

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Podcast #3

Posted by on Aug 23, 2014 in Beauty, Culture War, God, Homepage, Humor, Justin Bieber, Podcasts, Pop Culture, Power, Questioning Authority | 0 comments

Our new episode of Drunk Ex-Pastors  is now available for download and stream. In this edition of the podcast, Christian explains the “Ice Bucket Challenge” to me (call me cray cray, but it’s not apparent to me how pouring ice water over my head will help cure a disease); we soften our stance on the Michael Brown shooting a tad; we argue about whether more than one church-goer in 100,000 actually believes the things he claims to; Christian continues his complaint about air travel, this time focusing on overly-talkative slash voyeuristic travelers sitting next to him, and I accidentally (but kind of on purpose) endorse Huxley’s description of dystopic culture, except it’s not stupid people at the bottom of the food-chain, it’s unkempt ones. Oh, and we each consign the other to hell several times....

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Vanity of Vanities, All is Vanity!

Posted by on Aug 20, 2014 in Beauty, Food, God, Homepage, Humor | 6 comments

OK, here’s a question to determine just how vain you are: Would you rather be  25 but look  50, or be  50 but look  25? For my part, I would totally choose the latter which, I guess, makes me super vain. Also, if my outward physical appearance weren’t affected at all by the food I choose to eat, I would just eat pizza and burritos every day, regardless of what it did to my health.  And you know those people who claim to be “spiritual but not religious”? I’m pretty much the opposite.  Geez, I think I need to seek professional help. . ....

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Podcast #2

Posted by on Aug 17, 2014 in America, Culture, Culture War, God, Homepage, Humor, Justin Bieber, Movies, Podcasts, Politics, Pop Culture, Power, Questioning Authority, Racism, TV | 2 comments

Our second podcast is now available for download. In this episode, Christian and I discuss the shooting of Michael Brown, the unarmed black teen who was shot in the back and head by a white police in Ferguson, MO, last week; we explore the issue of whether people on the right are more ideologically driven than those on the left, who tend to be more pragmatic; we roll up our religious sleeves and dig into the nuts and bolts of the Rapture and its accompanying apocalyptic doomsday prophecies (during which hilarity cannot but ensue); and I complain about Hollywood’s over-sensationalizing of bathroom murders, while Christian moans about pushy salespeople and how they not only make him feel heartless but also cause him to publicly lament his years and years of poor...

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Podcast #1

Posted by on Aug 13, 2014 in America, Culture War, God, Homepage, Humor, Isis, Justin Bieber, Max Weber, Podcasts, Pop Culture, Questioning Authority, Racism, Work | 4 comments

As promised, the first of Heavy for the Vintage’s weekly podcasts is available for download (you can download or stream here as well as over at the Podcast page). In this episode, co-host Christian and I discuss the American attitude toward work and compare it to that of other cultures; we talk about the horrific actions of the Islamic group Isis and attempt to distinguish fact from fiction regarding the worldwide persecution of Christians; Christian vents about how pissed off he gets at airports; I bemoan how beholden humans are to machines as well as explain why most traffic laws don’t apply to me. And we accuse one another of racism like eleven...

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